Be nice

The last 6 weeks have been down-time for me. I spent 5 of those weeks with my granddaughter who came to live with us over her summer vacation. I didn't get a lot of painting or drawing in, but I have taken some time to think, observe, and get some new ideas. I also spent time doing what a grandfather should do - I talked with her, and tried to teach her some life skills.

One of our talks centered around relationships. Specifically, hard relationships that we have with people that sometimes get us uncomfortable, or mad, or that are just different than us. We talked about how when you do something nice for someone, you do it for yourself, not necessarily the other person. It's easy to do nice things for people when you feel good about yourself. And in turn, doing a nice thing for someone makes you feel good about yourself. When we do something nice, or give something away, and we do it without expectation, it doesn't matter what the other person's response (or lack of ) is. And it doesn't matter if that person DESERVES something different - doing something good has its reward and it comes from within.

So...I have to confess. There is someone I know who really gets under my skin. I didn't know what it was, and I have really been searching inside to see what was bringing up that response in me. It's not the other person - it's me. My response to that person is based on something within me, and I had to take the time to see what the root of that is so that I could move forward. I have learned not to let what other people do or say or how they act or react determine or affect my mood or my well-being. But this person just really strirs things up in me that I thought were gone.

After giving it some thought, the best I could determine (because this person has never done anything to ME personally) is that this person operates much like I have in the past - not thinking, reacting, going off, wanting control, working without a definite plan... all things I am capable of and don't like about myself. And being around that, listening to that, well.....it really sets off something inside of me that I have had to deal with in a constructive way. I've tried to like this person, but every time I get near them, a wall goes up.

I tried something today based on the conversation I had with Izzy... I made a birthday gift for them. Took them out to dinner. Painted a "wallet painting," and even framed it. And giving something of myself, getting away from my feelings, my insecurities, and my hang-ups....well...it just made me feel good about myself. And knowing I feel good about myself, I was able to just do something nice. And I liked it. It took me just a few minutes to complete this painting. It's "wallet sized," 2.5" x 3". I enjoyed painting it. They enjoyed receiving it. We both won tonight, and the world is a better place.

"Grace abounds" - Watercolor on canvas paper, 2.5" x 3"